The Unwritten Rules of Kenyan Life: Unpacking the Mejja Tabia

Kenya, a country rich in culture, history, and tradition, is home to numerous unwritten rules that shape daily life and interactions. The term "Mejja Tabia" roughly translates to "proper behavior" or "acceptable standards," encompassing a complex array of societal expectations and norms that govern the behavior of Kenyans. In this article, we will delve into the unspoken rules of Kenyan life, exploring what it means to be a responsible and respectable citizen in the country.

Respecting the elderly

One of the most critical unwritten rules in Kenyan society is to show deference to the elderly. Elders are highly respected and considered sources of wisdom and guidance. As such, younger generations are expected to:

Show reverence through greetings: Younger people typically greet their elders with a bowed head and the phrase "hakuna baba" or "asante baba" (there’s no problem/father). This demonstrates respect and acknowledges the elder’s status in the family or community.

Listen to their advice: The elderly are seen as knowledgeable and experienced, so it is customary to seek their guidance and wisdom in matters ranging from personal issues to community problems.

Assist with chores and errands: Younger people are often expected to assist older family members with household tasks or errands, demonstrating responsibility and care for the elderly.

Social norms around food

Mejja Tabia also dictate specific norms surrounding food, emphasizing the importance of:

Showing appreciation: Before eating, Kenyans usually express gratitude by saying "asante" (thank you) and/or placing a hand on the plate. This acknowledges the food’s value and the person who prepared it.

Using correct table manners: Table etiquette is crucial, especially when dining in formal settings. This includes waiting for everyone to be served before eating, keeping elbows off the table, and not using mobile phones during meals.

Saving food and waste reduction: Kenya is known for its limited food resources, making it essential to minimize food waste. Meager portions and second helpings are common practices in many households, demonstrating thriftiness and resourcefulness.

Clothing and modesty

Kenya’s mejja tabia emphasize the importance of dressing modestly and conservatively, especially when:

Visiting someone’s home: Wearing neat and clean clothes to someone’s residence is seen as a sign of respect for their hospitality. Flashy or provocative clothing may be viewed as insensitive or inconsiderate.

Attending events or celebrations: Dress codes may apply for events like weddings or funerals. In such cases, people tend to dress conservatively to avoid drawing attention to themselves.

Engaging in outdoor activities: When engaging in outdoor activities or visiting markets, people are generally expected to wear modest attire, avoiding tight-fitting clothes or revealing tops and bottoms.

Respect for others’ belongings

Another vital unwritten rule is to respect other people’s belongings, demonstrated through:

Locking one’s belongings: Locking bags, bicycles, and other personal items is crucial in Kenya, given the prevalence of theft.

Returning borrowed items: Lendees are expected to return borrowed items promptly, in the same condition as they were lent. This maintains the trust and rapport between individuals.

Handling belongings with care: People are often mindful of their belongings’ fragility or importance, treating them with care to avoid damage or loss.

The mejja tabia serve as a valuable guideline for living responsibly and respectfully in Kenyan society. By internalizing these unwritten rules, individuals can maintain positive relationships with others, navigate social situations smoothly, and build a sense of community. In conclusion, respecting the elderly, social norms around food, dressing modestly, and being mindful of others’ belongings are just a few essential aspects of mejja tabia, providing a foundation for building strong relationships and a cohesive society in Kenya.

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